Several weeks ago I was introduced to a project by BloomNation asking to share my thoughts on love. BloomNation is a community marketplace that supports local communities by partnering with independent florists, and I was immediately drawn to the idea of sharing some thoughts on simplicity within marriage. After all, my husband and I share one of those.. and we got engaged 7 months later” stories. We’re nowhere close to what we could accomplish over the years, but life is full of little battles and overcoming them.
I’ve heard it said many times that people who are subject to social experiments involving blind dates and prospective romantic partners often find themselves falling for someone very different from their personal conventional standards. Inexplicable? Probably not, because love is about unexpected, simple and subconscious decision-making. Setting high standards is important, but don’t miss the impromptu adventures waiting right around the corner while traveling off the beaten paths.
Here are a couple of things that have helped me keep things as simple and effortless as possible when it comes to marriage:
1.Thriving in simplicity
Staying in and cooking together, plane spotting, taking LOTS of summer strolls around the city, jogging, IKEA dates and volunteering together are just some examples of how you can be wooed and wowed by the other person without having to spend a dime. It’s great to go out for dinner every once in a while, but finding things to do that are free will keep things new and keep you on your toes.
2. Getting cozy
Learn to get cozy and wear a pair of sweats every once in a while in each other’s presence. Wear a lumpy bathrobe, your favourite oversized sweater, put up your hair in the messiest of buns, go makeup-less. You’ll thank yourself!
3. Little out of the blue surprises
There’s nothing like coming home to your favourite homecooked meal, chocolate treat, bakery dessert, some flowers or a little gift. It really doesn’t have to be big. The thought of someone going the extra mile for you makes a world of difference. It’ll perk you right up.
4. Becoming forgetful
Let me explain. Like a flower, life is brief. Learning to forget little disagreements, disputes, little side remarks and comments as quickly as possible will save you hours of your life. What might start off as cute little bickering and teasing sessions during your dating phase might not be so cute anymore a couple years down the line when they magnify into some resentful bitter funk. Stay forgetful. Let it go and understand that your partner’s actions are not necessarily intentional. It’s good for your health.
5. Create new memories, always
I’m not really one for making big life-changing declarations at the beginning of the year. But I’ll admit that I have promised myself to live more in the moment this year. I’ve constantly, for a long time, dreamt of living in a beach house by the water. Periods of stress sometimes make me think of the greener grass waiting on the other side of the fence. It’s human nature. But trying to make the best of those stressful days and living through them can really help you to start things anew. Be content and happy with where you’re at in your life. Enjoy taking on new challenges and take chances together. Set some goals and work them outwardly, hand in hand.
Just two days ago, one of my favourite childhood television hosts, Peter Lustig from a show called Löwenzahn (meaning dandelion in German) passed away. It was as though another part of my childhood had gone, dandelion seeds blowing off of a once-fluffy dandelion head. It was like a hand waving goodbye on a leaving train.
I think buying yourself a bouquet of flowers will always help to understand the brevity of life. No matter how much you take care of it, how much water or sun you provide, you will be forced to relinquish control of it at the end of its days. Be good to yourself, decorate your soul and love those around you. Be simple and lighthearted. Have a merry heart and you will have a continuous feast, always.
How do you celebrate love?